Truth In Satire
What You Should Do If Trump Gets The Flu
A guide to surviving in a dangerous world if our protector-in-chief goes down with the debilitating H3N2 influenza virus
Donald Trump says he has never had a flu shot and, in fact, has never had the flu.
Instead, to protect himself from serious infections and dangerous viruses, the self-proclaimed germaphobe washes his hands obsessively throughout the day, is reluctant to shake hands, and won’t touch doorknobs.
But this might not be enough to protect the president from the nasty H3N2 influenza strain streaking across the country this year, which the Center for Disease Control says is causing one of the worst flu outbreaks in a decade.
So what will we do if the man who is making America great again — faster than you can say “Russian collusion!” — is suddenly bed-ridden for weeks, incapacitated by the energy sapping H3N2 virus and unable to carry out his presidential responsibilities?
Here are 7 things you can do to successfully survive, even thrive, in the president’s absence:
