The smell of Donald Trump’s political death.
That’s what many in Washington are calling the odor emanating from the White House after evidence came to light last Thursday that President Trump tried to interfere in the Russia investigation, thus committing the impeachable crime of “obstruction of justice.”
The funk in the air is expected to linger for weeks, if not months, as the decaying presidency of Don-the-Con pollutes the atmosphere surrounding 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and wafts over the city.
Longtime political observers who’ve watched as other presidents have come and gone, even veteran bureaucrats who were around when Nixon called it quits after Watergate, say this particular stink is different than anything they’ve ever sniffed, and they are having trouble describing it.
Here are the words they’re using to characterize the stench:
“Imagine the reek from one of Bannon’s broken pustules combined with a lingering fart from the massive ass of BLOTUS after he’s finished off a bucket of Cheetos.”
“I think the best way to describe the odor is if you took the sour milk smell from New York City’s summer sidewalks, and stirred it together with some of Don Jr.’s thick hair pomade, then doused it all with any of the cheap fragrances from the Ivanka Collection. But it’s even more nauseating than that.”
“It’s like rotting oranges, mixed with decomposing roadkill, and just a hint of Russian borscht, but heavy on the cabbage.”
“Let me put it this way, Trump might have drained the swamp in Washington, but he forgot that a swamp smells like shit and he’s standing right in the middle of it.”
“My best guess is that the president is trying to destroy evidence of his criminal activities, because to me it has that acrid, scorch your nostrils smell of burnt paper, sim cards, and computer disks. It’s definitely smoldering physical evidence, that’s for sure.”
“Trust me, if you get a whiff of this foulness, you just want to puke right on the spot. I can’t even describe the fetor…just thinking about it makes me want to barf. Uh, do you have a wastebasket?!”
“Have you ever been in a retirement home where someone has died and they forgot to take the body out, and it’s been putrefying for days? No? Oh. Okay, well, the Trump White House has that same smell of old, dead, done people.”
“I’m betting it’s Stephen Miller’s blown circuitry — that psycho cyborg’s been advocating a scorched earth policy for this administration from day one, but in the end all he managed was a charred motherboard.”
“What does moron smell like that’s gone off? Because with Trump and all those other idiots in the White House reaching their expiration dates at the same time, that’s what the odor has to be — spoiled moron.”
Thanks to all the many readers, fans, followers, and even my frenemies, for reading and commenting on my posts throughout the year as I continue my commitment to post every day, 7-days-a-week until the Orange Accident is no more.
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