Truth In Satire

Trump’s Estranged Uncle Resurfaces, Wants In On White House Windfall

Jack Trump, who vanished in 1992, says nephew “owes me” — angles for administration post and 20% of Russian payoffs

Jack Trump, who disappeared in 1982, is believed to have been working as a marina manager in the Fiji Islands.
Uncle Jack claims he took this photo of his nephew, Donald Trump, graduating from the New York Military Academy in 1964. Parents Fred and Mary are on the left.
“I’ve been onto Donnie’s bullshit ever since he was a little ass kisser,” says Uncle SaJack Trump, “and when I threaten to take it all public, he’ll be begging me to accept a 25% stake in that new North Korean casino he’s planning.”

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