Truth In Satire

Trump Succeeds In Draining Swamp As 40 House Republicans Give Up Seats

Paul Ryan is latest casualty as president drives off more GOP reps who know they can’t survive a re-election covered in his slime

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Trump’s slime threatens to render the entire Republican party toxic in time for the fall elections. (Credit: https://twitter.com/badmovieman)

resident Donald Trump, also known as the Creature from the Black Lagoon, is now so toxic that 40 GOP House members have decided they can’t survive in his putrid political swamp and will abandon their congressional seats this fall.

According to the elections tracker, Daily Kos, more Republicans are packing it in than “at any time since at least 1952,” including the insufferable Speaker Paul Ryan who announced on Wednesday that he was drowning in swamp water and would vacate his House seat by January.

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Pollster Frank Luntz says that even more swamp creatures could leave the Trump lagoon on the Republican side. (Credit: www.huffingtonpost.com)

As one early GOP retiree from Florida said privately, “The reek from Donald Trump’s quagmire is already so foul, I won’t be able to wash it off for years. Most of my Republican colleagues feel the same way and they’ll soon be pulling the plug, too.”

The outspoken Republican pollster Frank Luntz said last Sunday that Republicans are covered in so much Trump muck at this point, that they could lose both their House and Senate majorities come the midterm elections. Luntz likened the stench emanating from the White House to “the nauseating smell of wet dog feces, mixed with rotten eggs, seasoned with moldering gingko berries and freshly-spewed vomit.”

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Nancy Pelosi tells Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer that a 40th GOP House member, Paul Ryan, has bit the dust. (Credit: cnbc.com)

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, excited by Mr. Ryan’s abrupt exit and the prospect of a “blue wave” in the fall elections, called the odor of decaying Republicans “as fine a fragrance as has ever graced my nose.”

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Thanks to all the many readers, fans, followers, and even my frenemies, for reading and commenting on my posts throughout the year as I continue my commitment to post every day, 7-days-a-week until the Orange Accident is out of our hair.

I read every comment. And I try to answer as many as possible.

Thank you.

–AI

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Writer. Satirist. Author. Cyclist. Visit me at allanishac.com.

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