Trump Signs Historic Agreement To Host “Miss North Korea Beauty Pageant”
President also agrees to be judge for first-ever bathing suit competition in a communist country
Playing to his strengths during a summit meeting with Supreme Leader Kim Jong-Un, President Donald Trump signed a historic agreement in Singapore on Tuesday morning agreeing to host the “Miss North Korea Beauty Pageant.”
“I’m very excited to legitimize the ruthless dictatorship of my good friend Kim Jong-Un by accepting an invitation to host his country’s super sexy communist beauty pageant to be held in the North Korean capital of Poontang next month,” said the president in comments to the global press corps. “I’m also honored to be asked by this extremely nice man to be one of the judges for the swimsuit competition which is, frankly, my favorite part of every pageant along with sneaking into the contestants’ dressing rooms. Anyway, I know this is going to be a really top of the line event and I’m just happy to be part of it. Thank you, Kim.”
Asked what if any progress had been made on the denuclearization of North Korea, which was the original focus of the Singapore summit, Mr. Trump said, “I know the fake news media wants to ignore the importance of this major beauty pageant for bringing our two countries together, but I think that’s just demeaning to the beautiful, high-quality North Korean babes who will be vying for the crown.”
As the summit came to a close, President Trump was said to be negotiating for the worldwide television rights to air the Miss North Korea Beauty Pageant using a shell company that he operates with Jared Kushner.
(Note: The president mispronounced the name of North Korea’s capital. It is Pyongyang, not “Poontang.”)
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