President Donald Trump showed Democratic leaders why he’s the sneakiest snake in the swamp last Wednesday, luring them into the Oval Office and pretending to strike a deal with them on raising the debt limit.
Playing them like a couple of washed-up pianos, the president showered Democratic heavies Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer with unctuous attention, even giving Ms. Pelosi a quick tickle to the vagina to lull her into a false sense of hope. Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and House Speaker Paul Ryan were also in attendance.
However, all who know him say that the cunning tactic was a classic Trumpian trick to set up a double-cross in the next few days.
“He does this all the time in real estate deals,” said a Trump International employee, speaking off the record, who referred to himself only as “Don Jr.” “He makes you think you’re his BFF on a big development project, then a week later he tells you he doesn’t remember ever meeting you and to go fuck yourself.”
Another Trump associate with a vampirish grin agreed: “I just can’t believe Senator Schumer, a native New Yorker himself, fell for it. Everybody knows that my Dad, I mean Mr. Trump, pulls this trick like every day. The Dems thought they were so smart, but they’re about to get rammed up the butt big time.”
The debt limit is a thorny issue that Republicans in Congress were hoping to use as leverage to win major concessions from the Democrats. While that objective now appears to be lost with agreement on a short-term fiscal deal, neither political party should be tallying their wins and losses just yet, as long as the mercurial Mr. Trump is involved.
Political observers point out that the president likes to reveal major policy decisions on the social media platform Twitter, and believe Mr. Trump is about to use a barrage of tweets in the next 48 hours to execute the perfect “you’re my best friend” bait-and-switch.
The stunned Republicans will subsequently breathe a sigh of relief believing POTUS has returned to his conservative senses and is back in their camp. But the ping-ponging of presidential loyalties is expected to continue throughout the week with the president using his victory dance after Hurricanes Irma and Harvey to distract leaders from both parties and keep them off balance.
He’ll then give them all whiplash again by pulling his seductive BFF routine on Raul Castro, the naive leader of Cuba, and opening the Trump Havana Golf Club and Spa Resort on the beaches of America’s longtime communist nemesis to the south.
Savvy Washington watchers say that many more presidential double-crosses are expected in the weeks and months ahead.
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