Thank you, Thomas, for recognizing me personally as the largest FAKE NEWS organization on the web.

Honestly, if I wasn’t making about $14,000 a day writing this fake news shit and getting paid per click, then I’d probably quit and go back to my job as a trapeze catcher for Cirque De Soleil. But this pays much better.

And I need to thank you for your click today, sir, which lined my pockets nicely.

Please, please, please promise me that you’ll come back tomorrow, and every day for the rest of the month, because I’ll be a little short on rent money at the end of April after having bought that Tesla and all. You can read about that special purchase in one of my other posts (please click it a few times — Teslas are expensive!).

Well, thanks again for becoming a new paying follower, Thomas. Couldn’t have bought the summer house without you!


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