Truth In Satire

Rudy, Desperate For Cash, Will Record Short Videos For “Sexy Bachelorette And Porn-Themed Bachelor Parties”

“I will also strip buck-naked and do a pole dance at your private ‘Risque With Rudy’ events,” said a destitute Giuliani

Taking a cue from “Don, my best friend,” Giuliani is using his criminal mugshot to promote a menu of humiliating personal services.

America’s Mayor is in despair, doing anything he can to generate cash for his mounting legal bills.

This week the indicted Giuliani announced that he has signed with Cameo, a site offering personalized video messages for all occasions, to record short, provocative videos to be viewed at adult and porn-themed parties.

He has also been promoting “paid-for-service” appearances, dubbed “Risque With Rudy” events, in which he will strip buck-naked and do a pole dance for private gatherings … or public ones for the right price.

A picture of falling hard from high places. (Photo Credit: Gregory Heisler)

While he admits that prostituting himself in these ways is humiliating after being named Time’s Person of the Year in 2001, Giuliani also insists that “… a well-choreographed pole dance is lots of fun, great exercise, and a real boost to the immune system.”