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TRUTH IN SATIRE
Prigozhin Plane “Maybe, Probably” Crashed By Accident, Kremlin Says
A spokesman for Vladimir Putin assured Mr. Prigozhin’s Wagner loyalists that they had nothing to fear if they chose to fly
In a shocking development that could have been predicted by no one, Yevgeny Prigozhin, the blunt-speaking leader of the Wagner mercenary group, who famously staged a mutiny against Kremlin leadership in June, died in a plane crash just outside of Moscow.
“Oh, what a shame,” said Boris Pachenko, a spokesman for Russian President Vladimir Putin. “Mr. Prigozhin was a valued member of the president’s cooking staff and his fine dishes will be missed.” Before founding his private Wagner fighting force, Mr. Prigozhin became famous and wealthy as Mr. Putin’s preferred caterer.
According to the state news agency Tass, “the Embraer private jet was carrying 10 passengers onboard, all members of Mr. Prigozhin’s elite culinary staff.”
After initiating the brief rebellion against Russia’s military hierarchy earlier this year, many outside political observers assumed that Mr. Putin would exact punishment against Mr. Prigozhin for embarrassing him and exposing vulnerabilities in Russia’s armed forces. But Mr. Putin…
