Hi Atomsk,

I am kind of embarrassed that you noticed my teeth. I’ve even filed them down a bit so they wouldn’t be so obvious.

But, anyway, to be clear, I am not a vampire. I am actually a vetala. Vetalas are serpent-like vampiric creatures that have adapted to appear human. So that’s why in the photo I’m wearing a cardigan sweater to cover up the serpent scales on my chest.

I sedate my victims with venom and feed off of their blood over a number of days, usually killing them by the fourth feeding. While I am eating, my snake-like eyes and four pointed fangs tend to be exposed. I can’t help it, it’s an involuntary response.

Just, FYI, I can be killed if you stab me in the heart with a silver knife and twist it, at which point I will revert to my true serpent form — whether I’m wearing a cardigan or not.

Just curious, you don’t own a silver knife, do you?

Thanks for reading my post, Atomsk, and also for invoking the city of Zion from the Matrix movies. How awesome was that trilogy?!


Writer. Satirist. Author. Cyclist. Visit me at allanishac.com.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store