Truth In Satire

At First Event After Royal Wedding, Harry Is Asked To “Leave The Black Girl Home”

Hopes that Meghan Markle would be treated as an equal by Royal Family were quickly dashed at function “barring colored people”

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Princess Harry looking concerned as Queen Elizabeth relegated Meghan to house confinement during a special royal event. (Credit:

ny notion that the marriage of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle might signal a new era of inclusion and tolerance among British royals was quickly dispelled when Buckingham Palace asked the ginger prince to “Kindly leave the black girl home” from a public event on Monday.

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The new Duchess of Sussex sat alone in the couple’s Kensington Palace apartment during the royal event on Monday. (Credit:

The abrupt exclusion of Harry’s African-American bride from monarchical affairs so soon after their internationally televised, high profile nuptials on Saturday raised eyebrows in England and shocked Meghan fans in the United States.

“I wondered if the Royal Family was sincere in welcoming Meghan to the fold,” said a American friend of the new Duchess of Sussex, who was a guest at the couple’s wedding. “I guess this is a resounding rejection of her regal blackness.”

A British prep school friend and distant relation of Prince Harry’s seemed intrigued but not overly concerned by the news that Meghan would be marginalized by the Royal Family.

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As soon as the wedding was over on Saturday, Meghan’s mother, Dorian Ragland, was whisked back to Heathrow Airport by the Queen’s guard. (Credit:

“Look, she’s a lovely girl, but Harry has always been impetuous when it comes to his lady friends, and everyone who knows him believes this ‘ebony phase’ will be short-lived. I give it a year before he gets back to his senses.”

Others who attended Saturday’s wedding and watched as Dorian Ragland, Meghan’s mother, sat alone in St George’s Chapel at Windsor Castle understood the significance of her isolation.

“You thought it was an accident that the Queen allowed only one person of color from Meghan’s family into the chapel?” asked a middle-aged viscount and second cousin of the Queen’s, who spoke off the record. “Hardly. It was enough that Oprah and Serena were there — more darkies than that and we would have had to inoculate the entire Windsor family!”

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Those who know the Queen well say she holds her breath whenever Meghan is around. (Credit:

Many people around the globe who were rooting for Meghan to become a fully integrated member of the British Royal Family are disappointed by this obvious slight so early into the couple’s marriage. But they are also hopeful that once Queen Elizabeth becomes more accustomed to Prince Harry bringing Meghan around that Her Majesty may let the American actress and media darling sit with her for tea occasionally and enter through a back door at Buckingham Palace at more regular intervals.

Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan had no comment for this article other than to say that they were delighted to introduce Negro spirituals and gospel music to England.


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