Truth In Satire

Already Blind, Trump Stares Directly At Sun During Solar Eclipse

President had no concerns about eye damage during Monday’s eclipse, being totally blind to reality with no vision for America

President Trump on Monday daring the sun to stare back. (Credit:

President Donald Trump was severely mocked for staring directly at the sun during Monday’s near total eclipse in Washington, D.C.. But the president was never in any danger, as he is already blind to most of the important issues facing America today and totally visionless with regards to a future growth, prosperity, unification, or peace plan for the nation.

The president happily caught some rays during the eclipse, while the yellow-bellied First Lady chickened out. (Credit:

The president merely scoffed from a White House balcony when told not to look at the eclipse without special glasses, a pair of which he had tucked inside a suit pocket. His gutsy, naked-eye stare down with the 6000°C star at the center of our solar system was praised as “impressive” by some in the conservative media and “tough as Superman” by others.

But it seemed reckless to doctors and scientists who warned that protective eyewear was necessary to prevent permanent eye damage. What they didn’t know is that Mr. Trump’s retinas are already non-functioning and permanently blind to color (especially the plight of black and brown), crimes (his own), history (in relation to foreign treaties and alliances), conflicts of interest (again, his own), bigotry (he sees white supremacist violence on all sides), and any perceptions of his own shortcomings (he has never glimpsed a personal defect in his life).

While the blind president is not afraid to gaze directly at the sun, he was heard to be yelling “the sky is falling!” at one point on Monday afternoon. (Credit:

Mr. Trump’s utter lack of vision not only allows him to boldly gaze at searing orbs that would instantly blind lesser men and women, it helps him remain oblivious to the many problems facing the nation.

The next total eclipse of the sun in the U.S. will take place in 2024. Mr. Trump, who will be just as blind then, is expected to host a sunbathing party on the roof of the Otisville Federal Correctional Institution in Otisville, NY, where many political observers and law enforcement officials expect him to be residing at the time.


Thanks to all the many readers, fans, followers, and even my frenemies, for reading and commenting on my posts throughout the year as I continue my commitment to post every day, 7-days-a-week until the Orange Accident is no more.

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