Truth In Satire

After Bannon Attacks Him, Donald Trump Says He Has Never Met The Former Aide

“Steve Bannon has nothing to do with me or my Presidency…I’m not even sure who he is,” claims the president

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One of the thousands of photographs of Mr. Trump with Steve Bannon, who the president now claims was an unknown, low level staffer. (Credit:

President Donald Trump is now calling Steve Bannon — one of his closest White House advisers and a man he has been photographed with many times — someone he has never met and doesn’t even know.

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Although Steve Bannon was one of the president’s closest allies, Mr. Trump says he thought he worked in the White House kitchen. (Credit:

Steve Bannon has nothing to do with me or my Presidency, okay, I’m not even sure who he is,” asserted the president in a statement released by the White House on Wednesday. “I’d see him around the Oval Office occasionally, but I thought he was one of John Kelly’s college buddies or maybe someone from the kitchen taking lunch orders. The idea that this scruffy guy with bad skin knew anything about the workings of my administration is absolutely absurd.”

The president’s dubious denial comes after Steve Bannon savagely attacked him and his family in a new book by Michael Wolff titled, Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House. Bannon, who is credited with being the architect of Trump’s election victory, went as far as saying that Donald Trump Jr.’s June 2016 meeting with a Russian lawyer was probably “treasonous,” and that the president certainly knew about it.

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Chauffeur? Secretary? Mafioso? Donald Trump says he has no idea who that man in the back in black might be. (Credit:

Shown the photograph above, taken in the Oval Office early in his presidency, President Trump said he does not remember the meeting or seeing Steven Bannon there. Mr. Trump added, “Look at the guy, who would think he was anybody important? He looks like one of the White House chauffeurs, or Mike Pence’s assistant. I don’t know. And I don’t care. The guy is nobody to me, never was.”

The Secret Service is now investigating Melania Trump and her daily presence at the White House after President Trump says he is not familiar with her “although I might have seen the woman at one of my beauty pageants once, hard to say. I met a lot of nice tail in those years.”


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