Special Mother’s Day Tribute

13 Things Donald Trump’s Mother Said The Day Her Son Was Born

Mary Anne MacLeod Trump, the president’s mother, made a number of telling observations about the future POTUS

Image for post
Image for post
Mary Anne Trump with her son Donald before he became America’s moron president. (Credit: thenewyorker.com)

udging by the historical record of various statements Mary Anne Trump made to her husband Fred, her obstetrician, and other people present on the day that her son was born, she knew something wasn’t right.

Here are 13 observations directly from the mouth of the mother of the future president, of particular interest to anyone struggling to understand Donald Trump’s corrupt, destructive, and immoral presidency:

  1. “I could barely push him out…it was like his head was swollen.”
  2. “Am I crazy or does this little birthmark here resemble a swastika?”
  3. “Goodness, he has such tiny hands. I hope that doesn’t prevent him from grabbing things when he gets older.”
  4. “Is that orange color normal, Doctor, or does he have a touch of jaundice…or the demon in him?”
  5. “Look, Fred, he purses his lips and makes that ‘o-k’ gesture with his fingers just the way you do.”
  6. “Watch how he rolls onto his back every time I place him on his belly…my boy’s a little flip-flopper.”
  7. “That’s kind of a small willy — I hope he doesn’t try make up for it by sleeping with every floozy in Queens.”
  8. “Careful, Fred, he’s reaching into your billfold.”
  9. “Have you ever seen a belly button that size? His button is much bigger than anyone else’s!”
  10. “I just pray he doesn’t become some sort of phony flag waver, thinking it’s up to him to make America great just because he was born on Flag Day.”
  11. “I love this little cowlick here. I can brush it over the bare spot on his head like a bad combover — isn’t that funny?!”
  12. “There he goes peeing on himself for the third time today. It’s almost like he enjoys it. What’s that called again, Fred, a golden shower?”
  13. “His sister had the eyes of a circuit court judge, but this one has the look of a crook.”

****

Thanks for your claps. Always appreciated.

I read your comments and answer as many as possible. They’re also greatly appreciated.

Go here or here to read two popular past posts.

For more original Trump satire, visit allanishac.com.

–AI

Written by

Writer. Satirist. Author. Cyclist. Visit me at allanishac.com.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store